Anyway, many things happened lately..and its so hard to cope with stuff..
Esp. when they all come together at the same time..
Now all my time is spent on practicing the piano for the upcoming exam, and I still have to start studying 4 sa2, and pack to get ready to move house..
Sumore I have to go miss neo house at least 3 times a week to practice on her grand piano..and it takes a lot of my time away..
Since each practice last longer than 2 ½ hrs..
Wonder how I was supposed to deal with all this..when something more drastic happened..
Haiz, this is it:
I broke up with him..
What’s worst is tt I still cant figure out why..
Anyway, I cried quite a lot the past few days till some of my sadness has turned into anger..
& I cant cry anymore now..
Tried asking him to get back together..but he is so reluctant liddat..
And its already below my values to beg or whatever..
Haiz, wonder why I always follow my heart..which is what makes me weak..
Ya, I admit I said very mean things but I wasnt the one who started everything..
Its like, I try my best to walk the extra mile for him, fell out with my frenz becoz of him..
Put him before my frenz..
And the next thing I know, he claims tt he wants out of this relationship becoz he thinks he is hurting me..
Anyway, what kinda logic is tt?? Not like I complain a lot bout him mistreating me, do I?
I dunno what else I can do..to salvage the relationship..
Other than having tt talk with him tml..
Tt he makes out to be full of all the negative things bout me and stuff..
Anyway, my frenz tell me its not worth my time to ask him to patch back..
Saying tt got so many other guys out there for me..
Say what they knew it wun last in the first place, since they dun find anything good bout him..
All I can say is,
I love him, I really do..
But if he really dun want to be back together again..and dun love me anymore..
I will juz let go and not pursue the matter again..
Maybe hate him for life, I dunno..
Juz hope what he will say to me tml wun hurt me worst than the state Im in..
Becoz it’s really so hard to act as if everything is fine in front of others..
Juz wanna say thanks to jodee for being there for me, jingxiang too..love u guys lots!
