Wednesday, July 05, 2006
i cant seem to pinpoint why i've been having headaches and nightmares lately..
i mean, it hasnt happened so often be4..
haiz, guess i have been thinking too much bout kenn lately..
its like, i dunno why he has to avoid me so desperately..
dun answer my calls, dun reply my smses, log off msn when i come online..
and then miss badm (i know the reason and so does ...)
even if he didnt like me anymore or wanted a r/p..
he could and SHOULD have told me instead of doing this to me..
even now i couldnt believe why i i got so frantic on sun..
tt i had to call alvin and yuan for help (thanks guys :P)..
anyway it was of no use..
till today, it has been 3 days since he last contacted me already..
and he only forwarded the Happy World's Best Friends Day chain msg back..
tt was all he did..
haiz..weishun told me not to give up initially..
tt kenn and me both had to sit down and talk it out..
tt we came a long way and
its a pity to give it all up..
so i msged kenn bout it on sun night..
and told him to give me a reply the next day if he still bothered bout me..
he didnt..
i'm disappointed, extremely..
and i'm hurt..
i tried my best already..
i turned my life upside down for him..
i stopped msging other guys for him..
but he found me possessive
becoz i ended up msging him all the time..
and he strongly believed tt i dun want him to play dota
when tt wasnt even my intention..
and the list goes on..
now, i'm tired of trying already..
i'm done trying..
so haiz, although i really still dun wanna let it go..
i think its not worth it to hold onto him anymore..
he's changed..
and he is not worth my tears anymore..
i deserve someone better..
♥ poured out my thoughts at
9:12 AM
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